Selecting a mate to mate with

Is this the person you want to be the mother of your children?

Is he the one?

The moment we see someone, their physical appearance speaks to us. Unconsciously or consciously, we note their physical attributes. The texture of their hair, height, shape of their face and lips as well as their size. If you’re a man, certain anatomical features get observed instinctively and the same for women. What we don’t consider in that moment is if this person is suited to be a reproductive mate and how effective they would be at rearing children.

The idea of children tends to come to mind much later in the progression of a relationship. By this time it is a matter of if one wants children and how many? For some the appearance of a child is completely random and unplanned for. This is a life altering situation that rightly should not be entered into without much thought and careful planning.

So, you find someone extremely attractive, fun, sweet and smart but….there’s a big but. Their negatives attributes are concerning but tolerable. Have you considered if this is the person you want to partner with in rearing of children? Before making a monetary investment in a company, you do research and properly investigate this firm’s financials and track record as well as future projections. You check out the school extensively before applying. We take a similar approach when purchasing property whether land, building or vehicle. What about your offspring?

The truth of the matter is that while some persons may make an ideal short term sex partner, they are not suited to be parents. Anyone with reproductive capabilities can become a parent but mothering or fathering a child takes a great deal more than biological functionality. Looking at someone through the lens of attraction leads to an obscured vision. Now, your child will not just have this individuals’ genes but also a cultural innoculation procured over generations. Culturally derived and curated behaviour traits will form the bedrock of this child’s early devolopment.

Is he good with kids?

Natural selection says only the fittest of the fittest will survive. In several larger animals only the strongest most dominant male is able to mate with the females. This increases the chance of producing a strong offspring and maintains the gene pool. So the choice of mate affects the next generation. You want your child to have the best chance of becoming successful and devoloping to their fullest potential. The quality of the input significantly affects the output. Physical and psychological traits of parents are a key determining factor in characteric features of an offspring. Therefore, the act of procreation must be treated as sacred, because the impacts are far reaching.

“Sowing of wild oats” is a phrase we have come to associate with male sexual promiscuity. Men go around and impregnate women in various towns and cities with no intent to settle down. The results are fatherless children and single moms struggle to raise these kids. The flip side is that some women are not prepared to be a mother. They are not willing or ready to make the sacrifices warranted for raising a child. Their sexual encounters are just about having a good time. It is therefore essential that individuals take a long hard look at this person you’re about to lay down with. Don’t make permanent decisions because of temporary feelings. This momentary lapse may affect the life of a whole next generation.

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